All posts filed under: journal

personal drabbles, what would be my journal ?

Chia’s (deeper?) Car Seat Headrest cuts recommendations

Reading Time: < 1 minute First, download the compilation. It’s about 3.7gb zipped entitled Car Seat Headass from my lovely little Google Drive: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1MZwTLmRdqqF769pFShtbL2zZ4egMVw7j/view?usp=sharing Then, play from the Spotify playlist! Make sure you’re on desktop and are all set up with local files. youtube version coming soon maybe Sourced from the following: The Brodster’s Will Toledo Discography, other albums not on Bandcamp (1, 2, 3, 4, Disjecta, Little Pieces, etc), selected 2020 traitincommon livestream compilations shout out to will toledo for playing (what i want to believe in my delusional mind) my broken birds request on the 4/30/2020 livestream a day before my bidet. and much love to everyone who knows every album down to the color of the livestream ones lmao please do not roast me i know some of these are not that deep here’s the og flowchart i made sometime late november 2020 as a general introduction since a lot of people have been asking for it! i know i am not using the terms properly haha. right-click and open image in new tab for full size …

Pondering domesticity

Reading Time: 7 minutes I remember how much I dreaded the idea of settling down when I was a teenager. It meant to resign oneself to gated communities in Manila, hour-long drives to take your children to Catholic school, and empty pleasantries at Sunday mass for the rest of your life. In my raw, unexposed head –– there was nothing more foreign and undesirable. Nothing farther from passion. The imagery of man and wife strolling across malls rioted in my mind. My sister passing me off in a sweltering church, sweat and little gore past decades-old lace. Settling down in terms of Catholic womanhood meant to forego all of one’s love and potentialities to entirely devote yourself to another. (Do I not do this today, or at the very least seek to?) In the age where half your friends don’t know how to drive and the other half are falling madly, deeply in love. So deeply that they begin considering human permanence. One friend concusses and sees god, another one swears that they found Him in themselves after someone …

End of September life update

Reading Time: 4 minutes rushing to the art school, back to my apartment calves on fire redefining what community is, again and again feeling emotions beyond stress(!!!!), almost to the point that it’s scary where no one else can embrace you, the wall with your memories and your work offers respite — like, in material form, all the people you love embrace you in memory swaying on the sticky floor of the Orville Peck show, where some dudes in front of you offered a better spot because he spilled beer all over himself watching said dude ask the girl next to you if she wanted to dance, and watching him get rejected as she replied “i’m gay” at a thousand decibels comcast support agent randomly pasting in SufjanStevens at the end of ur convo in the midst of a crowd of late 20s gays/theys on the state house, back after years, taking in insane experimental sets checking 5 beers off their draft selection in one night, all but 2 tasted terrible; beer is still pretty good though 5-hour long …